Lyn Zusman, 53, pleads "Let's honor the troops the right way -- don't do it for shock value.''

Shockingly insightful. Because she has a point, doesn't she? Whatever happened to honoring the troops with a jazzy, lemon ribbon? Or a snazzy car magnet? Whatever happened to honoring America's war dead by, say, applying extra lipstick? Or saluting the fallen troops with a brisk game of Ring-a-levio? Or a gentle nudge to the rib of your local barber? How about showing some real American patriotism and starting a "Happy Hill" meme in your own neighborhood? You could write the number of American troops not yet dead! Hunh? What's with all this focus on pain? (WWRS? What Would Rummy Say?) How committed are you to ending this hunt for WMD mission accompli occupation these last throes burst of sectarian strife Civil War, anyway? I mean, seriously, you stink of Patchouli. Let go of all the Hippie-love, Department of Peace, Free Speech fluff! It's a brave new world, citizen. It's a New American Century and across these Baghdad skies shine the phosphorous light of Liberty. And about time!

The weeping heart lefties who put up the sign that reads "In memory of 2,867 US Troops killed in Iraq" don't even understand American History. It's embarrassing! Who gave them the idea that this nation was ever interested in live soldiers, or "peace," anyway? War is an American pasttime so stop getting up in a tizzy. Don't buy into those bargain-rate T-shirt decals, dear one. You've got it allllll wrong. Think of the pop boom bang of the Grand Ole Fourth of Ju-ly! Quick quiz: Do you think that bang-bang symbolizes inner or outer peace? Quick, answer! No Wikipedia!

Think of the Boston Tea Party. Think of our ever-climbing rate of funding the Military. Think of the way we instigate or are in some way complicit in the causes of almost every war we wage! So save your sign-painting muscles, dreamer. Every once in a while the dog gotta eat. And if you want to win races, you have to infuse this haunted hell-hound with a rusted ladle of Smashed Gook or a long shovel of deep-fried Sand Nigger (Names invented by our own proud agents of Democracy and kept alive by our media, so love 'em long time, baby...or censor them, better yet). I mean whatever happened to celebrating war? All this "memorializing" of dead troops just seems like such Pre-9/11 Thinking.

Put it this way, for the simple-minded. Can you deny that thinking about dead American soldiers provokes discomfort in highway-driving, sign-reading Americans? Exactly. Then you have to admit that this Sign of Pain goes against everything this great nation is built on. Firstly, we invented TV so we don't have to read. Additionally, are we over there in the Middle East dropping bombs on funeral processions and restaurants and razing wedding parties with machine gun rounds and raping young girls and then burning their bodies to an evidence-obscuring crisp just so that good citizens of American can feel all uggy inside as they drive along, mayhap completely overlooking the low prices of gas when they stop for fuel? No wonder the weak-kneed Democrats destroyed the Republicans in the last election! The good citizenry of this nation were being distracted from feeling the afterglow of the economy by a constant procession of Pain Signs.

I hope you understand why I would show such, well, accentuated non-comfort at this latest assault against America. I hope by now, you see the threat such a "memorial" or sign poses to our great union. Because too much of this, and the citizens of this most divinely-justified nation may begin to think twice about invading other nations. They may, in the future, want "reason" things before launching genocidal (but very lofty) efforts against a foreign population. With their daily pain-free driving routes peppered with these verbal and political mines, Americans may start to think about killing, and what it means. And that would mean all those dead troops would have died in vain.

Do you want that on your hands?

Then be a good American and help atrocities like this:

vanish from the record of human achievement.