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17 de Octubre, 2007
In Search of the Blue Agave
Categorized under Humor , Nezua's Tome of Tequila Etiquette | Tags: historia, Tequila
OH, is dear México allowed to keep anything for herself?
Impregnated with Frankencorn, her children reviled at every turn, and all the while her treasures are still being stolen! Even the tiny sapphire parts.
MEXICO CITY — Mexican tequila makers are battling a surge of knockoffs as distillers worldwide try to make a profit off the drink's growing popularity.The imitators range from sugarcane moonshine made in Mexican garages to quality spirits made from agave plants in South Africa, Mexico's Tequila Regulatory Council says. The group says it is mobilizing lawyers to defend tequila's good name.
While some consumers may not know, or care, if they're getting an impostor, Mexican producers are concerned that the drink's image could eventually be damaged by subpar products. Tequila was once the drink of Mexican peasants, and tequila makers spent decades and millions of dollars in advertising to get it into fine restaurants and trendy discotheques.
See? We owe it to the peasants and campesinos, mami. Venga conmigo. Let's support México together. What'll you have? I'm thinking about the Patrón. Can't afford that, well, then I'll grab the 1800 if I must. No Cuervo. The peasants. It would be an offense. Don't you think?

Mexico and 26 other countries, mostly in Europe, have signed a treaty that protects the name tequila. Under that pact, known as the Lisbon Agreement, only liquor made from blue agave — a desert plant with long, sharp spines — can carry the name, which comes from a town in the western Mexican state of Jalisco. The liquor must contain 51% agave.The same treaty says only wines from France's Champagne region can be called champagne and only wines from Spain's La Rioja region can be called Rioja. [...]
The Tequila Regulatory Council said it has found fake tequilas across South America, Europe, Australia and the USA. In Britain, one company even put the tequila name on bottles of paint thinner, the council said.
To fight counterfeiters, the tequila council has hired detective firms to comb bars and grocery shelves worldwide, Miguel Cruz said. When they find knockoffs, the council contacts Mexican embassies, foreign governments and law firms to put pressure on the producers.<
This sounds great. I can see it like destiny, like a film, springing up in my mind. The Tequila Council. I have to get a job with these vatos. This sounds nuts. Undercover tequila tasters. With government muscle. I wonder if they'd let me wear a zoot suit on the job. I can see it now....[swimmy special effect, brass riff, classical guitarra arpeggio]




Comentarios (10)
Dee Loralei dijo:
Hahah Nez, maybe you can do something like that if you get the MTV gig.
Palabras por Dee Loralei spat forth on el 17 de Octubre, 2007 at 06:29 PM
nezua limón xolagrafik-jonez
dijo:
i must. for the youth. for tomorrow's college graduates, bound for cancún resorts! i must work vigilantly to keep their Spring Breaks from being infiltrated by anything but the purest agave nectar!
Palabras por nezua limón xolagrafik-jonez
spat forth on el 17 de Octubre, 2007 at 06:33 PM
RC dijo:
Hey, I asked you readers before, but no one offered to help me out: How do I make the tequila? I have the real plants, they're even bigger now {they get really big, like 8 feet wide} and at some point they are probably ready, perhaps now.
What's the recipe? Nez, I like the photo, but it seems a little too blue.
Palabras por RC spat forth on el 17 de Octubre, 2007 at 07:31 PM
nezua limón xolagrafik-jonez
dijo:
it was only the bluest one i could find. and then i pushed the saturation level even higher. but ONLY A NOTCH!!! damn you. i think you should be on the Tequila Council with me, bro.
the recipe is one block right, three blocks right, nine hundred feet, second shelf from the top! do i look like a farmer? i'm an artist, jim, not a distiller! seriously bro, if google can't help you, i'm definitely outgunned on this one. lo siento. but i'd love to hear the outcome if you find the recipe.
Palabras por nezua limón xolagrafik-jonez
spat forth on el 17 de Octubre, 2007 at 07:36 PM
sly civilian dijo:
"Tequila Council"
best. job. evar.
there are some things that just should never be globalized...and regional spirits are one of them. i know i'm just feeding some corporate monster, but at least i'll get a good drunk out of it, right?
Palabras por sly civilian spat forth on el 17 de Octubre, 2007 at 08:05 PM
peasant dijo:
Nez, You should get your own "T-Seal." The council has awarded 50 businesses with the seal, why not a website? It might even come with some free agave nectar.
Palabras por peasant spat forth on el 18 de Octubre, 2007 at 05:14 AM
Pete Shot the Deputy dijo:
RC: Your plants have to be around 10 years old to be ready to produce Tequila. If they're that old, you then cut the leaves off, leaving only the heart. You then bake the heart, shred it, then press all the juices out of it. Add yeast, and distill. Repeat distilling at least 2 more times, then put oak barrels to age 2 to 12 months.
This is, of course, a rough outline. The specifics are trade secrets that vary from distiller to distiller. Also, unless you make it in Jalisco, it's not Tequila. (I don't care what the Tequila Trade Agreement says)
Palabras por Pete Shot the Deputy spat forth on el 18 de Octubre, 2007 at 08:08 AM
Ihadira dijo:
That is positive news. I am glad they are rallying to do something about it. The drop in prices due to the desire to grow corn and also the Fusarium oxysporum fungus has caused a lot of farmers to sell to bigger tequila producers. I would wrtie more and finish my thoughts but gotta go to class now C-ya
Palabras por Ihadira spat forth on el 18 de Octubre, 2007 at 10:46 AM
Presidente Gonzalo dijo:
Don't know much about tequila, but I recently discovered agave nectar in health food/Whole Foods stores. It's a low glycemic sweetener, which means it doesn't make your blood sugar soar. it's very sweet, tastes great, and I use it now in tea, yoghurt, etc. A number of different brands are out there. Maybe this'll help the agave market in Mexico!
Palabras por Presidente Gonzalo spat forth on el 18 de Octubre, 2007 at 02:02 PM
RC dijo:
Pete Shot the Deputy: Thanks so much, I just sold the old plants, dang. The ones I have now are only three years to five years.
It sounds like a lot of work, and tearing those plants apart is kind of cruel.
Unless they die around ten years old anyway. I have to check.
I guess Nez has the best plan for us non-Jalisco growers. Just buy a bottle.
Considering the wait and the effort, the home made may not be worth it.
But the plants ARE very beautiful.
Palabras por RC spat forth on el 18 de Octubre, 2007 at 03:41 PM